Utterly Brilliant Thoughts: Is It Over Yet?
Is It Over Yet?
I know I say this, well, pretty much every week, but God, this week has just kicked. my. ass. It's pretty much been downhill since the Steelers beat the Saints on Sunday. (Thank God for that. If they would have lost, Cleveland would have had a better record and I simply cannot have that.) But anyway, this week.

Remember The Accident?

The one that happened on my wedding day?

The one where the insurance company (evil State Farm) won't pay for my medical treatment, not because they deny their client's culpability, but because I foolishly attended my own wedding and reception after said accident?

Yeah, that one.

Well, the deposition was scheduled for Monday morning. What a fiasco. I actually made it to the building early, which in & of itself is a minor miracle. However, the doors were locked. All of the doors. I can say this with complete certainty because we walked around the entire building (the length of a city block, in the rain) & through the attached parking garage. We finally made it into the building through the stockroom of the bar next door. I am still curious about why it was open at 9am, but who am I to judge? It's Happy Hour somewhere, right? At least we finally figured out a way into the building. Unfortunately, our excitement was short lived when we discovered that it was vacant. Say it with me, people. Vacant. No people. No elevators. No heat. Just us, a mint green propane tank & what may have been the world's largest rat trap. Oh, yes, I said rat trap. It should also be mentioned that I was with my mom (hi, Mom!), who has a pathological fear of rodents. She wouldn't even watch Stuart Little. (Okay, I know, no great loss, but still.) My attorney, who was driving in from Cleveland, eventually showed up & we figured out where we were supposed to be. (The court reporter's office was moved to a new location across the street, something that you think they would have mentioned to at least one of us when this was set up.) Then we waited for another hour for opposing counsel to show up, which was fun, but, you know, at least this building had heat and plumbing and no apparent rodent infestation. And the defendent was cranky, clueless and defensive, which would seem to be in my favor if we have to go to trial. Also, there's no way you can win if a jinglebell necklace and a sweatshirt with an enormous cardinal on it are your going-to-court clothes. Especially if the plaintiff is wearing Tiffany jewelry and heels and actually did her hair. Those are the rules.

My boss informed me that everyone is getting a raise. Oh, wait, did I say "everyone"? I meant, "everyone but me". But I was the lucky person that got to inform everyone about their raises, so . . . that's almost as good, right? And since I haven't had a raise since July 2005 (and that one was miniscule), the shock might have killed me anyway.

My boss attempted to convince me that the company is going to lose money now that everyone (else) will be making more. (And therefore cannot afford to give me a raise too. He does not attempt to explain to me why I should care.) When I point out that his budget information is flawed, that our commission income is more than double the amount shown & that I make $10,000 less (gross!) than is indicated, & that in fact the company is making a considerable profit, he refuses to discuss it further. He engages a colleague in an extremely non-PC conversation (sometimes I swear I'm working for Archie Bunker), then leaves to set up his brand-new plasma television. Probably responding to the negative energy in the office, my fax / printer refuses to work.

A homicidal maniac is on the loose. He is obviously enraged by my lingering Halloween decorations.

This is what greeted me when I came home from work today. Pumpkin seeds are strewn across my entire front porch. Stupid squirrels. But my mom was nice enough to bring me freshly-baked chocolate chip cookies, and I think we may have a solution to the Christmas Conundrum, so today wasn't entirely bad. Maybe there's hope for tomorrow. Or maybe I'll eat enough cookies that I won't care.

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